For those tired of my felonious renditions of pizza and pasta, I finally have a semi-legitimate and complete meal for you. In this installment of DannyMakes, I have butter-basted fresh swordfish on a bed of risotto accompanied by roasted asparagus. I’m not one to brag, but it was probably the best meal I’ve made in a long time. If only I had someone to share it with, but unfortunately she recently left me. With that said, this is a fairly low effort, high reward meal that is sure to impress your guests.

Let’s start with the fish. I was staring at the filleted fish in the refrigerated Publix seafood case for about five minutes before making my decision. There was tilapia, which is inexpensive with a mild flavor, cod, which is also inexpensive but not my favorite, and other white fish that seemed enticing. But I can get those fish anywhere. While pricey, the quality of the swordfish in Florida is unmatched throughout the rest of the US. So I smashed open the piggy bank to get myself a 5.5oz fillet. Yes, swordfish does have a more pronounced “fishy” flavor than most other fish, but I really like its meaty texture. Like tuna or mahi mahi, the swordfish is built for speed, so the toned muscles create a firm bite when cooked. If you prefer a flakier fish that falls apart when you look at it for too long, I’m not going to fault you for it, but I’ll take a more hearty piece of piscine flesh any day of the week.

I seasoned all sides of the fish with salt and pepper. Since I didn’t gave grinders, I ground my salt and peppercorns in a mortar and pestle, which is honestly pretty badass. I sauteed the fish on all sides in butter over medium-high heat to get a good sear. I wasn’t too concerned with the interior being cooked yet since I would be basting it shortly thereafter. Once all sides were seared, I removed the fish from the pan to A) let it rest for a few minutes and B) cool off the pan before adding the butter.

Once the pan was cooled, I added a tablespoon or two of butter with some sliced shallots and oregano. Why oregano? Because that’s what I had in my fridge, and it happened to pair very well with the other flavors in the dish. I don’t care if it’s not an approved combination. Once the butter was melted and foaming, I added the fish back into the pan and started basting. To be honest, I had no idea how long this was supposed to take. I just kept basting until I had a golden crust (or, more accurately, basting until the risotto was done), making sure to adjust the heat to avoid burning the butter or other ingredients in the pan. I was using my induction plate, which can pretty much boil water on its lowest setting, so it’s hard to gauge an equivalent heat setting. I think a medium heat will do just fine here.

Before starting the fish, I got going on the risotto. Full disclosure, being new to making risotto, I dropped my ego and followed the steps on the jar of arborio rice. The only ingredient I didn’t have was the “dry wine.” First of all, what in god’s name is dry wine? Is that just powdered wine or some shit? Pretty sure it’s just as wet as the rest of them. I’ll get flamed for this, but I called an audible and substituted lemon juice, which worked out well. The acidity, fruitiness, and citrus flavors of the lemon juice were a good substitute for the dry white wine, which wine snobs might describe as acidic, fruity, or citrusy for all I know.

I sauteed some diced shallots in olive oil and butter before adding the rice. Once the rice was coated and slightly toasted, the dry wine lemon juice went in. Once the lemon juice was absorbed, I added “hot” chicken broth, one cup at a time. Not sure how hot hot is supposed to be, but I went with whatever temperature a ceramic mug of broth reaches after one minute in the microwave. And I’ll be damned if it didn’t work out just fine. If you know a food purist who demands everything be prepared using authentic ingredients and methods, drop them from your life now. Just use whatever makes sense, whatever you have on hand, or whatever you think will be good. Nothing matters. When the final cup of broth was absorbed, I removed it from the heat and stirred in the parmesan.

Be patient with risotto. The first two cups of broth with absorb very quickly, but the last two will take some time. To use an analogy, a dry sponge is going to absorb water very quickly, but it takes time and energy to force water into an already soaked sponge. Another point of disclosure, I’m not entirely sure how long the final broth cup and parmesan stir took. My Delta-8 gummies were kicking in right around this time, so I was traversing the multiverse while trying to stir my risotto and butter baste my swordfish. But I can narrow it down to between 30 seconds and 20 minutes. Once I returned to this plane of reality, I plated the risotto and swordfish.

Going back in time once again, I tossed asparagus spears in olive oil, salt, pepper, and lemon juice and threw them into a 400°F oven for about 20 minutes. The outsides got crispy, but the insides were a little overdone. Next time, I would probably reduce the cooking time a bit and crank the heat up, but they turned out well enough this time. Here’s another cooking secret: It really doesn’t matter what anything tastes like. As long as it looks good, people will eat it. And most people are too tactful to ctiticize your cooking to your face, so they will just nod their head and say it tastes good. That’s my favorite part about being really stupid. If you’re too dense to realize that most compliments paid to you are disingenuous, you think that people actually like and appreciate you. And that intellectual vacuum provides a great barrier between you and your next existential crisis.

Here’s how the dish turned out. Still working on my plating skills, but I was too hungry to care how good it looked. I really enjoyed this dish and would absolutely make it again. There was a lot of babysitting involved between stirring the risotto and basting the fish, but as long as you’re free enough to stand over the stove for a half hour, it’s well worth it. And don’t forget to squeeze the lemon over the fish for some added punch.

Do you have a favorite food you want me to make? Please provide suggestions below or contact me here.